This was me in first year.
I was tanned from a whole summer of working at a day camp as a counselor. My hair was longer and untamed (I had an aversion to hair products at the time). My rez card was around my neck, a hallmark of the stereotypical frosh. The jeans on me were way too baggy, and I thought I was cool because I enjoyed making funny faces in front of the camera.
According to this photo, some things haven't changed. I still love eating (copious amounts of food!), although its clear that my friend Michael on the left could put me to the test. I'm still a goofy person and enjoy making other people laugh when I get the chance. Maybe the weird face does show some personality after all.
My other friend Ari, on the right, is currently at Queen's Medical School finishing up his 1st year of studies. I went to high school with both Michael and Ari. I'm still supertight with Michael as we lived in the same house for the past 3 years. He's my Polish Polar Bear and I'm his Asian Sensation.
Fast forward in time and here is a current picture of me.
This is me in my parent's optical store the day after my graduate school interview at UofT. Ha, no goofy face (I screwed up a bunch of earlier photos and, frankly, my mom was getting fed up with my antics). My hair is shorter and I am dressed more formally. The dress shirt, tie, and vest combo is a new style that I tried this year. I am quite comfortable with the combination and know that it will pass as being professional.
When I look at myself in comparison to 4 years ago, I can't help but think that whatever the outcome on May 15th - I will continue to be proud about who I am, the difference I have made in some people's lives, and the experiences that have shaped the core of my values and beliefs. I've learned to overcome obstacles, such as the worry about losing a close family member to the shock of not getting a desired MCAT score. Struggle and even failure has motivated me to expend all of my resources to make the mark, but even doing my best is limited by the constraints of factors beyond my control. Attitude, as I've learned, is everything.
So seeing how far I've come, I'm anxious to understand how well prepared I am for the next stage of my life, be it grad school or med school. Do I have the knowledge and skills to be a competent researcher? Will I be able to handle the stressors of being a medical student? Is the pursuit of academia or medicine going to make me happy? How will my obligations to my family, friends, colleagues, or more broadly society change? These are all big questions that I am wrestling with and I'm sure a few readers can relate to my situation. I am intimidated about what the future has in store for me, but excited about the prospects of setting and reaching higher benchmarks.
All of this reminds me of the importance of ongoing self-reflection. Life is busy and personal reflection may seem like a nuisance for some people. When I was younger, I didn't see the value of it. Reflecting felt like a chore with no compensation, and there were better things to waste my time on. I realize that reflecting (as I'm doing now) forces me to extract meaning from major and minor experiences in my live so that I am better able to draw inductive inferences when similar situations present themselves in the future. This thought is probably no surprise to anyone, but I'm sure that most of you can agree that there is always more room in your lives for introspection.
I finish with a quote by Thomas Paine: "The real man smiles in trouble, gathers strength from distress, and grows brave by reflection."
WC
No comments:
Post a Comment